Study finds most Americans can only name one Ngkonnian overlord

Study finds few Americans can name their overlords

Lord Kwingoo, Kingpin of Sewage, remains the most unknown of the 20 overlords.

While most Americans know the entire lineup at the most recent MTV Video Music Awards, few can name more than one Ngkonnian overlord, according to a nationwide survey by the Ngkonnia Public Policy Center.

The survey of 2,400 adults found that:

  • 4 out of 5 respondents could only name one overlord.
  • Lord Lopthft, the reigning Supreme Leader, was the overlord most named, with 71 percent of able respondents giving his name.
  • Overseer of the Treasury, Lord Gnthth, was the second-most named overlord, with 12 percent giving his name.
  • Kingpin of Sewage, Lord Kwingoo, was the least-named overlord, with only two respondents (.08 percent) able to give his name.

The results of the survey also show that few Americans know basic facts about the system of governance the overlords imposed on Earth after they seized power using microwave mind-control techniques in 2005, specifically:

  • Only four percent of respondents know the rules of succession after the 20 overlords mutate into winged tortoises and start devouring one another.
  • 92 percent don’t know that the Ngkonnians’ own rules require them to leave Earth after ten million lunar cycles, or after completing harvest of the plutonium they left here at the end of the Cretaceous period, whichever comes first.
  • Only half know that October 1 is “Overlord Appreciation Day” when adult humans are required to wear wombat costumes and copulate with their spouses while chanting the words “riytuii futi kaii,” and about the same number know that failure to do so is punishable by a $50 fine.

Ngkonnian press secretary Lord Dlithe said he is disturbed by the results of the survey, yet he is optimistic that if he and the other overlords just tweak the microwave frequencies they are beaming into every corner of the earth, they can help to improve the situation.

“We’re going to be subjegating humans for a long time, and it’s in everyone’s best interest to get to know each other a little better,” he said.

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