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North Korea’s Supreme Stud drives the ladies crazy

December 20, 2013

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Some say it’s the charm he cultivated while attending boarding school in Switzerland. Others say it’s his powerful pheromones that seem to shout: “I am man.”

Recently, however, the 30-year-old heartthrob has been entertaining hordes of women with his latest sexy stunt: an awesome tattoo across his belly that says “Sumpreme [sic] Leader 4 Life.”

Workers everywhere were given a day off to celebrate what’s now called “Our Supreme Leader’s Heroic Tat” day.

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Earlier this year, Kim Jong-un’s title was changed from Leader to Supreme Stud, a move that sent shockwaves through the political establishment.

Whether it’s to look at his designer ink, touch his silky hair, or beg for the release of imprisoned relatives, women can’t help but to throw themselves at him.

“I would sooooo do him,” said a pretty young woman from the countryside who had walked for three days to get to Pyongyang. “If I had the energy. I’m famished.”

Will any of Kim Jong-un’s mojo rub off on NBA star Dennis Rodman, who is in North Korea on a visit? Most likely not, and many say the Supreme Stud will have to give Rodman step-by-step instructions how to woo the ladies.

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North Korean media outlets have been informing citizens that while they may admire Dennis Rodman from a distance, they are not allowed to grope him.

What if Rodman’s exotic looks and athletic physique happen to perk the interest of some of North Korea’s female citizens?

“Oh, we only have eyes for the dear Supreme Leader,” said Li Sun-Hi, a 34-year-old engineer and member of the secret police. “Could you please write that down? Please?”

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