
ISLAMABAD, Pakistan — Secretary of State John Kerry said he hopes US drones that have been flying over Pakistan for many years will soon “decide to migrate home” to their native habitat in North America.
He made his comments on a science program on Pakistan’s ILIM-TV. The program was aired Friday across the nation.
“Our biologists who study avian life have not yet determined why these drones deviated from their normal migratory paths,” Kerry said. “It might be due to Earth’s changing climates, or perhaps light pollution is to blame. City lights, for instance, can confuse the drones, causing them to fly in holding patterns for days on end.”
Kerry said if the drones do not migrate back to the United States on their own, the military will employ a new drone program, called Come Home Birdies. A new, larger drone will act as dominant leader and attempt to fool the others into following it across the Arabian Sea to an aircraft carrier where they can roost. They will then be transported to Alaska to be released into the wild.
When the host asked Kerry how Americans feel about their beloved drones having been gone for so long, Kerry paused before admitting that most of the country cares little about mechanical birds of prey. He added that many Americans mistakenly believe drones to be fictional airborne robots from Star Wars — similar to the droid C-3P0, but with wings.