God apologizes for answering prayers for Jennifer Lawrence nudes

Saying He was merely responding to an unprecedented flood of prayers, God has apologized for facilitating the release of hacked nude photos of actress Jennifer Lawrence. He says He is often unaware of the minutiae of life on Earth, and He was simply trying to make everyone happy. “It’s fair to say God has heard literally millions of impassioned pleas that if such selfies existed, they be quickly released for the public good,” said a spokesperson. She added that God expresses His regret for any embarrassment or feelings of violation from which the 24-year-old “Hunger Games” stars is suffering, admitting He should probably better investigate such popular requests before fulfilling them, particularly if they are mostly submitted by men. He added He does deserve credit for ignoring the trickle of demands for fresh nudes of Lena Dunham, saying those prayers struck Him as rather weird.