BRUSSELS — After years of aimless fooling around, leaders from the G7 have discovered their G-spot, located in the European city of Brussels.
“Oh ja, oh ja, that’s where it is,” said German chancellor Angela Merkel upon arriving in Brussels for a summit of the group of seven nations comprising the most advanced economies. “What a wonderful thing to discover, especially at our age.”
European Union president José Manuel Barroso said he could not believe how good it feels now that the G-spot has been found.
“Ay, ay, com caralho,” he said. “This certainly spells a new, sexier life for us leaders, as well as a second age of erotic diplomacy for the G7.”
Canadian prime minister Stephen Harper said he was thrilled the group had finally stumbled upon its most elusive erogenous zone, but he is surprised it turned out to be in the capital of Belgium — often considered a boring city and known mostly for its bureaucratic institutions — and not in a far more mysterious and steamier place like Ibiza or the the Maldives.
“This summit is so good, it’s gonna make me….” Harper said before falling down in a fit of spasms.
Under pressure from his wife Michelle, U.S. president Barack Obama is reportedly sleeping in a hotel in Bruges, which, although a breathtaking UNESCO World Heritage site, is decidedly unerotic. Former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi even once described Bruges as the the greatest libido killer in all of Europe, even more than the sight of French actor Gerard Depardieu eating spaghetti and getting sauce all over his face and shirt.