Dennis Rodman pleased with his North Korean prison cell

dennis_rodman_koreaAmid the clicks of cameras, a visibly proud Kim Jong-un took Dennis Rodman on a tour of a new prison for VIPs and high-value prisoners.

The North Korean leader had ordered the construction of the prison to coincide with Rodman’s arrival. It is the third time the NBA star has visited the country, and likely his last.

Rodman will be so enamoured with his designer suite in the prison that he will remain in the country indefinitely, according to sources.

North Korean state media report the last two times he visited, the 52-year-old Rodman was forced to go back to the United States by President Obama, who had threatened to decimate Rodman’s family with a guided missile if he didn’t return.

During the tour, Rodman was welcomed by smiling prisoners, many of whom used to be leaders in industry and government and — if our imaginations allow — enjoyed lifestyles similar to Rodman’s, with endless dinners, parties, and couplings with any woman of their choice.

One trio of prisoners surprised Rodman with an acapella rendition of 1999’s “Livin’ La Vida Loca,” which they had mistakenly believed to be this year’s top single. Nevertheless, Rodman graciously complimented the inmate singers and told them it was his favorite song.

In a rare move, Kim Jong-un carried Rodman’s designer suitcases to his new bedroom, a sprawling 1200-square-foot lair big enough for one tall male prisoner and many female prisoners.

Despite the bars on the windows and problems with the heating system, North Korean officials believe Rodman will enjoy living there.

“Is most bester prison in Top Korea,” Kim Jong-un said before asking Rodman to surrender his passport.

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