Press secretary Carney shows off awesome new beard

On Monday, White House press secretary Jay Carney gave his first public appearance sporting his new beard. White House aides say the 14-year-old Carney had been trying to grow a cool little mustache for more than a year, but that despite his best efforts, the sprout of fuzz was often mistaken for chocolate milk. Over the holidays, however, Carney experienced a spurt of puberty. White House physician Dr. Edgar Bryson said the rapid appearance of thick facial hair is not unusual. “When boys mature, they go through all sorts of rapid transformations,” Bryson said. “Don’t be surprised if Jay’s voice suddenly becomes unrecognizably low during these next few weeks.”