Most people opposed to being shot in face

Dandy Goat - Voted Best News Satire 1912 and 1913!A survey conducted by the Mariah K. Blair Center has demonstrated that most people are opposed to being shot in the face. Out of 1400 individuals questioned, only three responded favorably to the idea of “having a bullet exploded” through their faces. The remaining 1397 people said they were “strongly opposed” to the idea. “This explains a lot,” said Ian Keller, the sociologist who designed the survey. “From the fury about what happened in Ferguson, to the reluctance of parents to let their children watch torture porn, we can now say we know why.” Keller said his next survey will try to determine if women like having their feet stomped.