Giant Japanese sea bass says Pacific Ocean now clear of Fukushima radiation

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Last Friday, a giant Japanese sea bass addressed the House of Representatives in Tokyo where legislators were gathered for the opening ceremony of the 184th Diet. According to a Nippon News Network (NNN) camera crew that was setting up to broadcast the ceremony, the giant sea bass entered the building unobstructed by policemen, as they were uncertain about protocol. The sea bass stood in front of the podium for approximately four minutes while hurriedly giving a speech. It insisted that the Pacific Ocean was now clear of radiation from the Fukushima nuclear accident. Commercial fishing, the fish said, could recommence in all Japanese waters. The sea bass then slipped out of the building and flopped around for several blocks before passing the Mita Police Station where it jumped into the harbor near the Rainbow Bridge.