A Super Bowl halftime show that will go down in history

Super Bowl halftime show - dancing sharks

by Sandy Shark

As a shark, I’m often told I have bad taste, especially when it comes to the arts. Admittedly, I’ll take a Michael Bay movie over a Wes Anderson flick any day. And maybe it’s because we sharks are colorblind, but I couldn’t tell the difference between a Picasso and a Van Gogh even if you offered me a million belugas with a cholesterol problem.

But I’ll tell you what: I know a good show when I see one, and the Super Bowl XLIX halftime show on Sunday night was one for the history books.

That giant mechanical lion wading through a sea of color-changing balloons was out of this world, and I’ll never forget the optical illusion of the rippling squares on that checkered dancefloor. Let’s not ignore the flying star shooting sparks out of its butt: a testament to modern engineering and the power of the imagination.

But the best part was when those dancing sharks took the stage. The crowd really went nuts. I mean, you’d think everyone had forgotten about the football game. Tom Brady? Who’s he? No one cares about some boring ol’ quarterback when you have a pair of reef sharks stealing the show.

Now, I understand that some people want to criticize the sharks because the one on the left apparently forgot the routine and broke into some improvised jiving. But do you have any idea how difficult it is, as a shark, simply to stand upright? Our tails are strong, sure, and indeed we are gifted with symmetry and a streamlined form, but that’s only useful in the water. Most sharks I know can’t even stand up but for a moment.

Yet those two sharks in the halftime show were not only standing, they were rhythmically swaying to and fro, all the while doing some amazing moves with their pectoral fins.

Was their routine extraordinary? You might not think so, but who said art needs to be complex? Belly dancers might not have complicated moves, but no one in his right mind would deny the beauty of belly dancing.

I just hope that critics can put aside their bias for humans, and appreciate the dancing sharks for what they are: a natural wonder and a work of art. With any luck, dancing sharks will become a mainstay of every Super Bowl halftime show.

Sandy Shark is a white shark from Northern California